Erring On The Side of Caution

I’ve often regretted being human, what with all the mistakes I’ve made and my propensity for excessive self-berating. Some have been big, some small, it all depends on the eye of the beholder (lucky for me, my boss thinks they’ve all been little). We are “reassured” by peers that we learn from our mistakes, become stronger, better, smarter…or at least we should. After all, as Alexander Pope wrote, “to err is human” so there’s no avoiding it.

Or is there?

According to the majority of available literature, interviewees are strictly prohibited from acknowledging a mistake or weakness. Ford Myers’ Get the Job You Want Even When No One’s Hiring repeatedly decrees, “Never state anything negative.” Ros Jay’s Brilliant Interview echoes this sentiment and advises replying with one (or more) of the standard four “defenses:” humor; something personal; something from a while back from which you can demonstrate a lesson-learned; something the interviewer will perceive as a strength.

Despite several good points, Ellen Reeves’ Can I Wear My Nose Ring to the Interview? also falls prey to this popular opinion and she takes it a step further saying, “Interviewers aren’t really expecting you to [reveal a real weakness]. If you do, don’t be surprised if an offer isn’t forthcoming. But you need to answer.” Indeed, denial or “sanitizing it” as Casey Hawley puts it in his Job Winning Answers to the Hardest Interview Questions (of which the illustrations are the best part) is common.

I would like to protest on behalf of hiring managers and recruiters everywhere but perhaps I am the exception in seeking a candid answer to this question.

I am consoled by the handful of writers whose approach differs from the aforementioned. Pierre Mornell’s Hiring Smart, an excellent resource for interviewers and interviewees alike, recommends interviewers derive their own conclusions about an applicant’s frailties based on their self-proclaimed strengths and other shared details. Prevailing interviewee behavior aside, Mornell’s approach is smart as is Jeffrey Fox’s book Don’t Send a Resume, an inspiring, creative and thought-provoking compilation of insights that stand the test of time (he published in 2001 prior to the onslaught of the internet). Like Mornell, Fox acknowledges that interviewers have concerns but he reminds us that the interviewee does not know what those are! A smart interviewee will look for clues to understand where the interviewer has concerns and, Fox says quite simply, “if you know how the company will benefit from hiring you, then with planning and creativity, any hiring concern can be handled.”

When I’m interviewing an applicant, I heed Fox and Mornell as well as doing my utmost to obtain a ‘confession.’ I do this because I need to know if I can compensate for and/or manage your shortcomings when I hire you. Because by definition everyone has deficiencies, it helps to remember that, like beauty, their severity is in the eye of the beholder. Maybe you’re a night person and that will work well for me since the other team member is a morning person and the combination gives me longer coverage. Maybe you’re a bit too blunt which will serve me well since the other team member is a bit too reserved and I want more feedback. Furthermore, disclosing an imperfection indicates to me that you have some modicum of self-awareness.

One of my cardinal rules is to not hire anyone who does not admit to making a mistake. To be clear, by ‘admitting’ I mean I need to hear the words ‘I was wrong’ or ‘It was my mistake.’ Saying ‘I should have’ or ‘I could have’ fails to demonstrate an acceptance of one’s wrongdoing. As a hiring manager, I need to know that you take responsibility for your mistakes and do not blame your boss, subordinates, colleagues, neighbor’s pet. Since rectification is preceded by acknowledgement, your admission assures me that I will be able to trust you when you’re on my team. Additionally, if you have no mishaps with notable consequences, I will surmise that it is likely you have not held significant responsibility in your previous roles.

Truly, it’s to the benefit of all parties to know the truth. When one enters a job for which s/he is ill-suited, it is an ill-fated relationship that will cause frustration and unpleasantness on both sides before the short-lived affair comes to a bad ending.

Even bearing all this in mind, in my experience, chemistry, cultural fit and personal compatibility are the ultimate deciding factors. Employers will often take individuals who are less than 100% qualified vis-a-vis the specifications when there is a ‘click.’ Forgive the analogy but it seems to be like dating. You might have a checklist but if there’s chemistry, the so-called requirements are often cast aside (hence, perhaps, the current divorce rate?).

There is no such thing as the perfect person- each of us brings flaws, faults and foibles to our work place. I’d like to forcefully protest erring on the side of caution when disclosing our frailties but I’m not convinced our ‘reality’ obsessed marketplace is ready for real reality. So instead I invite you to take the concept with you for when we get there and…someone at home will undoubtedly thank me.